Hey Dads,
Helping a child to grow and learn can sometimes be a real challenge. I think that sometimes I have to forget who I am for a while and simply remember what it was like to be a child myself to fully understand the amazing joy that come out of a child’s imagination.
Ian has been watching a little bit of the Olympics every night before bed; his favorite sport so far has been the speed skating. Since the first time he saw Apollo Ohno skate he has been pretending to speed skate around the house, of course he wants someone to ‘skate’ with him. I can honestly tell you that in a very short amount of time the other night he had tired out parents, his aunt, and his grandma, and still had energy to keep going with all of us watching.
As someone who grew up using his imagination to create amazing fantasy worlds to play in, I understand the importance of letting him use his imagination. What I am struggling with is how exactly to let him do that, and still teach him the important things that he is going to need in life. There I go again trying to grow him up faster then he needs to. He’s only two and half! I have to remember to just let him be a child, because with in his playing is exactly what he needs to learn about the world around him.
A Fellow Father
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
Big Moments
Hey Dads,
I would like to apologies to my reader, for not having given the names of my beautiful children sooner, my two and a half year old is named Ian, and my two and a half month old is named Noah. They are amazing boys, and I truly am very blessed to be the father to these two amazing boys.
Speaking of these boys today was a very big day for little Noah, he rolled over for the first time today. He was having some tummy time this morning and was getting frustrated, he doesn’t really like tummy time, so he pushed and pushed until her rolled over. This was a very special event for me because I missed Ian’s first time rolling over, and he didn’t repeat it for nearly a month. So seeing Noah’s first time was special for me. The idea that this was the first step to his becoming model is kind of amazing, and yet I am not nearly as scared of that happening with Noah as I was with Ian. I think it has something to do with being a little more experienced as a dad. It is moments like these that really make me appreciate being a dad.
A Fellow Father
I would like to apologies to my reader, for not having given the names of my beautiful children sooner, my two and a half year old is named Ian, and my two and a half month old is named Noah. They are amazing boys, and I truly am very blessed to be the father to these two amazing boys.
Speaking of these boys today was a very big day for little Noah, he rolled over for the first time today. He was having some tummy time this morning and was getting frustrated, he doesn’t really like tummy time, so he pushed and pushed until her rolled over. This was a very special event for me because I missed Ian’s first time rolling over, and he didn’t repeat it for nearly a month. So seeing Noah’s first time was special for me. The idea that this was the first step to his becoming model is kind of amazing, and yet I am not nearly as scared of that happening with Noah as I was with Ian. I think it has something to do with being a little more experienced as a dad. It is moments like these that really make me appreciate being a dad.
A Fellow Father
Monday, February 15, 2010
I dedicate this post to my beloved Wife
Hey Dads,
I think that sometimes I take being a dad to seriously, in the recent weeks I have learned some very valuable lessons about that, but if I am going to tell this story, I have to back up a little. Three weeks ago it became apparent that I did not really have a future with the company I had been working for and they made it clear that they were not sure I could be molded in to kind of person they wanted, so I left. This has been hard on my family because I am the sole provider, and with my income gone we are facing hard times. During all of this I have worked very hard to keep in close contact with my children in order to be emotionally there for them as they see their parents very stressed, but like I said at the beginning of this post, I have been taking my job as dad too seriously. I have been so concerned with making sure that my children had have enough emotional support that I have been neglecting my wife, and consequently not been giving her the reassurance that a husband in this situation needs to be providing.
It is interesting that at times I get so caught up in being a dad that I sometimes am not able to remember what it means to be a husband. My wife is a very special woman, and the realization that I may have taken her love and her support in this situation for granted is kind of disturbing to me. I don’t like that idea that I am responsible for a great deal of the stress that my wife is currently under. I think in all truth I have been hiding with my children because I feel so ashamed for having left my job. It was not something that I wanted to do, and I have not enjoyed being unemployed however it is simply were I am right now this instant.
I know that she will read this posting and I guess all I can really say is I’m sorry and I am going to do better in the future.
A Fellow Father
I think that sometimes I take being a dad to seriously, in the recent weeks I have learned some very valuable lessons about that, but if I am going to tell this story, I have to back up a little. Three weeks ago it became apparent that I did not really have a future with the company I had been working for and they made it clear that they were not sure I could be molded in to kind of person they wanted, so I left. This has been hard on my family because I am the sole provider, and with my income gone we are facing hard times. During all of this I have worked very hard to keep in close contact with my children in order to be emotionally there for them as they see their parents very stressed, but like I said at the beginning of this post, I have been taking my job as dad too seriously. I have been so concerned with making sure that my children had have enough emotional support that I have been neglecting my wife, and consequently not been giving her the reassurance that a husband in this situation needs to be providing.
It is interesting that at times I get so caught up in being a dad that I sometimes am not able to remember what it means to be a husband. My wife is a very special woman, and the realization that I may have taken her love and her support in this situation for granted is kind of disturbing to me. I don’t like that idea that I am responsible for a great deal of the stress that my wife is currently under. I think in all truth I have been hiding with my children because I feel so ashamed for having left my job. It was not something that I wanted to do, and I have not enjoyed being unemployed however it is simply were I am right now this instant.
I know that she will read this posting and I guess all I can really say is I’m sorry and I am going to do better in the future.
A Fellow Father
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
A Learning expirence...For Me
Hey Dads,
There are times when I am completely surprised by just how much children can teach you about yourself. I have always been cautious and never taking a leap to anything before I knew as much as I possible could about things. Because of this I think at times in my life I have been fear full to do things simply because they were knew and I didn’t know how it was going to affect me. Well I learned a valuable lesson yesterday when I took my two year old sledding.
It had been snowing all morning and at lunch my wife recommended that I take our son sledding for the first time, I thought that this was going to be a lot of fun and that he was going to enjoy it. When we told him what we were going to be doing, he said he didn’t want to and his little face began to quiver with fear, but I thought he was just nervous because he had never done this before. So I took him out. He enjoyed being pulled around on the sled, but then I took him down one small hill and that was the end of it. There was no way I was going to get him back in that sled for anything. I am very sorry to say that my son was truly terrified by the experience. While I was disappointed that he had not liked it, it also had my eyes opened about two very important things.
This first is just how much like me he really is, he has the same dislike of doing new things that are scary to him. The second and very important thing that I learned was just how powerful childhood fear is. I did not listen to him and because of that he is now very afraid of sledding. I learned of the importance of showing him how to overcome fear by doing so myself, but I also need to listen to him, because he will always tell me what he needs, I just need to have trust in that.
A Fellow Father
There are times when I am completely surprised by just how much children can teach you about yourself. I have always been cautious and never taking a leap to anything before I knew as much as I possible could about things. Because of this I think at times in my life I have been fear full to do things simply because they were knew and I didn’t know how it was going to affect me. Well I learned a valuable lesson yesterday when I took my two year old sledding.
It had been snowing all morning and at lunch my wife recommended that I take our son sledding for the first time, I thought that this was going to be a lot of fun and that he was going to enjoy it. When we told him what we were going to be doing, he said he didn’t want to and his little face began to quiver with fear, but I thought he was just nervous because he had never done this before. So I took him out. He enjoyed being pulled around on the sled, but then I took him down one small hill and that was the end of it. There was no way I was going to get him back in that sled for anything. I am very sorry to say that my son was truly terrified by the experience. While I was disappointed that he had not liked it, it also had my eyes opened about two very important things.
This first is just how much like me he really is, he has the same dislike of doing new things that are scary to him. The second and very important thing that I learned was just how powerful childhood fear is. I did not listen to him and because of that he is now very afraid of sledding. I learned of the importance of showing him how to overcome fear by doing so myself, but I also need to listen to him, because he will always tell me what he needs, I just need to have trust in that.
A Fellow Father
Monday, February 8, 2010
Two year olds!
Hey Dads,
As a father it is important to keep perspective on what is going on around me, sometimes it is pay special attention to my two year old in order to keep him from hurting himself, at other times it is deliberately ignoring certain behaviors simply because I know that he is exploring the world around him and that if I really were to punish him it would be me who was in the wrong. While this may sound strange to some people, it is a technique called Gentle Discipline, and so far I have found it to be very powerful in discourage unwanted behavior, let me give an example.
Yesterday I was in the kitchen and heard a pouring sound, coming into the dinning room I found my two year old pouring milk out of his small pitcher onto the carpet, I was very surprised and at first I wanted to punish him, and I said his name a little louder then I meant too. Instantly I say his eyes fill with tears and he started saying “No be in timeout!” as though this was the worst thing in the world. I instantly realized that he was simply exploring his world and that while I did not particularly like this behavior, if I punished him I would be inviting him to do this again later. So I simply reassured him that I was not angry with him, cleaned up the milk and we went about the rest of our day.
There was not big fight between parent and child over what he had done, we redirected his energy to pouring water in the sink, and that was the end of it. I know that this method is not for everyone, however I think that when parent and child work together towards what is best for all, then family harmony is simply going to occur.
A Fellow Father
As a father it is important to keep perspective on what is going on around me, sometimes it is pay special attention to my two year old in order to keep him from hurting himself, at other times it is deliberately ignoring certain behaviors simply because I know that he is exploring the world around him and that if I really were to punish him it would be me who was in the wrong. While this may sound strange to some people, it is a technique called Gentle Discipline, and so far I have found it to be very powerful in discourage unwanted behavior, let me give an example.
Yesterday I was in the kitchen and heard a pouring sound, coming into the dinning room I found my two year old pouring milk out of his small pitcher onto the carpet, I was very surprised and at first I wanted to punish him, and I said his name a little louder then I meant too. Instantly I say his eyes fill with tears and he started saying “No be in timeout!” as though this was the worst thing in the world. I instantly realized that he was simply exploring his world and that while I did not particularly like this behavior, if I punished him I would be inviting him to do this again later. So I simply reassured him that I was not angry with him, cleaned up the milk and we went about the rest of our day.
There was not big fight between parent and child over what he had done, we redirected his energy to pouring water in the sink, and that was the end of it. I know that this method is not for everyone, however I think that when parent and child work together towards what is best for all, then family harmony is simply going to occur.
A Fellow Father
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Holding a Sleeping Baby
Hey Dads,
Today I would like to talk about angles, not the kind that are found in holy books, not I am talking about children. I was sitting on the couch the other night watching a movie and holding my 2month old son. He had fallen asleep in my arms, and at one point I looked down at him and was stunned by the look of complete peace that was on his face. It was the most beautiful moment that we have shared since he was born. What is truly amazing is when I was holding him, he knew that it was his Daddy who was holding him, and he knew that he was completely safe.
The moment passed quickly, and even now the wonder of it is starting to fade, just as the wonder of similar moments that occurred with my 2year old when he was a new born. The funny thing is, this second time around I have a better idea of which moments are going to stick out in my mind as I watch them grow. Watching my son sleep in my arms is definitely going to be one of them.
A Fellow Father
Today I would like to talk about angles, not the kind that are found in holy books, not I am talking about children. I was sitting on the couch the other night watching a movie and holding my 2month old son. He had fallen asleep in my arms, and at one point I looked down at him and was stunned by the look of complete peace that was on his face. It was the most beautiful moment that we have shared since he was born. What is truly amazing is when I was holding him, he knew that it was his Daddy who was holding him, and he knew that he was completely safe.
The moment passed quickly, and even now the wonder of it is starting to fade, just as the wonder of similar moments that occurred with my 2year old when he was a new born. The funny thing is, this second time around I have a better idea of which moments are going to stick out in my mind as I watch them grow. Watching my son sleep in my arms is definitely going to be one of them.
A Fellow Father
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